Oh can you hear the gentle jangle of the jingle bells?
And taste a hint of mint in every venti Starbucks sells?
Last time I checked the halls had all been decked with red and green
It heralds something merry - Only one thing this can mean:

     No, not again, it's Christmas! - It's Christmas! Not again!
     I barely got the tree from last year dragged out to the bin.
     Oh God, again, it's Christmas! - It's Christmas! Not again!
     It's great in moderation, mate, but only now and then.

I think I took down last year's lights about a week ago.
There's fruitcake frosting in the fridge is an antique, you know.
The closet's full of greeting cards I guess I never sent
And brand new ties I've yet to wear to even one event!

     Oh, not again, it's Christmas! - It's Christmas! Not again!
     I know it comes but once a year, but this one feels like ten.
     Oh God, again, it's Christmas! - It's Christmas! Not again!
     Don't get me wrong, I like the songs. But only now and then.

The malls are full of shoppers... The lots are full of cars...
My Christmas list does not exist! And where the hell'd I park?!
Just three more weeks of shopping. The tension really mounts.
I'll just buy something lame and claim that "It's the thought that counts!"

But when I see this mass of presents huddled 'neath the tree
And when I think that some of them mean someone's thought of me
I know I'll be as buoyant as a boy on Christmas morn
And say, "Hurray! Today's the day some so-an'-so was born!"

     So now again, it's Christmas! - It's Christmas, once again!
     I've got a thousand cards to write. Has someone got a pen?
     Thank God, again, it's Christmas! - It's Christmas, once again!
     I like it like I like my inlaws...
                                                       Every now and then!