Merry Frikkin' Christmas
by Price/Goode
music by Jonathan Price /
lyrics by Jeff Goode
copyright © 2003
Cast (sings):
Merry Frikkin’ Christmas
From all of us to you.
If Jesus Christ were here right now.
He’d wish it on you, too.
But the Goyim wouldn’t know it (if he did)
Cuz he’d wish it in Hebrew.
Oh Merry Frikkin’ Christmas
Cuz it’s been that kind of day.
If Santa Claus were here right now,
I’m sure you’d hear him say:
"Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho hoooooo!"
As he exits on his sleigh.
Jewish singer:
Dreidel, dreidel, dreidel
I got you from my pop
He bought you at a strip mall
In the ju-da-ic-a shop.
Soloist: Time for a bridge?
Pianist: Yeah, okay.
There was an old man from Nantucket
Who’s schlong was so long he could suck it.
I’m not saying he did.
But when he was a kid.
He got coal in his socks by the bucket.
(spoken:) So you do the math.
Female singers:
Naughty man-from-Nantucket!
Everybody:
Merry Frikkin Christmas
Happy Hanuk-Kwanza, too.
From every frikkin’ one of us
To all the frik of you.
God bless us every frikkin’ one.
And Allah bless us too.
SHALOM!