Vixen, in playwright Jeff Goode's battle-weary series of monologues, has accused Santa of sexual assault, which prompts each of the not-so-tiny reindeer to step forward to testify before an investigator.

There are eight 10-minute monologues that require each performer to hold the stage alone - a major risk which some of them should have avoided.

Labor violations in Toyland emerge as well as rape, perversion, alcoholism, bestiality, pedophilia, feminist tirades and general unpleasantries, all played in front of a huge backdrop that hits "Fat Boy" with an obscenity. It attempts, with no hint of a wink, to put the X in Xmas.

Frankie Little Hardin, who plays Blitzen with deadpan seriousness as well as directs this outing, informs the audience: "When a doe says 'no,' it means 'no.'" She bemoans the fact that she has to prance around wearing only a leather harness on Christmas Eve.

The reindeer put Santa in the hot seat - and in the process make us squirm.

There is a good deal of repulsion from the outright bad taste of it all. Laughs could save it, but there are more gasps. The seriousness could have paid off if the play developed some suspense about the truth or untruth of the allegations - one story against the other, as in "Rashomon."

Instead, the deer waver - each one reflecting a single social evil and feeling no need to stay on subject.

Dating from 1994, Goode's work has played from London to Norfolk and, in some cities, created a stir to the point of box-office sellouts. One can only guess that he is trying to suggest that we are overly obsessed with such tawdry headlines.

There were nine people in the audience that sat with me and, even encouraged to try to laugh, they appeared to be catatonic. Or shell-shocked?

Dasher (Jeremy Lister) is the macho deer who proclaims that he was always the lead except for that one foggy night when Rudolph, much to his rage, took over.

Cupid, who calls himself "the only openly gay reindeer," is flagrantly overplayed by Jordan Noble with a giggle that is grating . He mostly berates Mrs. Claus for boozing it up with the elves. (Somehow, we hope you haven't read this far, but convention requires that you be given the pulse of the "show.")

Dancer (Eileen P. Quintin) is a kind of Jewish Valley Deer who still regrets that she couldn't be a ballet dance . Instead, she's been driven to drink. Her flightiness is a welcome respite from the harangues of the other reindeer.

Prancer (Jonathan Ward) is nicknamed Hollywood and sparks a few hints at authentic humor with his protest about the movie "Prancer," which, he claims, foolishly starred a little girl and presented him as a computerized "thing." Those who remember the movie can sympathize with him.

Donner (Kent Collins) is the aging, disillusioned father of the poor, deformed Rudolph, who has now been committed to an insane asylum because Santa threw him over for Vixen. It's referred to, fitfully, as "the unfortunate Rudolph incident."

As tired as we may be of the cliches and repetitiveness of Scrooge and the like, Goode is taking on the wrong fella when he takes on Santa.

If you're going to trot out bad taste this blatant, then you'd better season it with a little laughter.

Reach Mal Vincent at (757) 446-2347 or mal.vincent@pilotonline.com.