No Time For Explanation
by Jeff Goode
copyright © 2007
(LIGHTS UP ON: FRANK alone onstage, possibly waiting for a bus.)
(JEFF dashes in from the left.)
(Jeff takes off running in a circle.)
Jeff: Dont just stand there!
(Jeff continues running in a circle around the stage. Frank shrugs, and joins in.)
(Suddenly, Jeff stops. Frank catches up to him.)
Frank: Whats going on?
Jeff: Theres no time to explain. We have to act fast.
(Jeff pounces into "catching" crouch. Ready to grab something.)
(Frank eyes Jeff, quizzically.)
Jeff: Did you get one?
Jeff: Dammit, man! Stop screwing around.
(Jeff pounces back into "catching" position.)
(After a beat, Frank does the same.)
(After another beat, Frank suddenly claps his hands together.)
Frank: I got one!
Jeff: Come on!
(Jeff sprints out the stage left door. Frank runs after him.)
(Jeff dashes in from the house.)
(Frank dashes in after him.)
(They stop onstage to catch their breath.)
Jeff: Okay, when I count to 3 (notices that Frank no longer has anything in his hands.) Where is it?
(Frank quickly claps his hands back together.)
(Jeff isnt falling for it.)
Jeff: You let it go?!
Jeff: (furious) My God man, do you know how many lives are at stake?
Frank: (pointing back the way they came) It must have got away
Jeff: We have to go back!!
(Jeff dashes back out through the house.)
(Frank, tired of it, does not follow this time.)
(Jeff dashes in from left and resumes "catching" pose.)
Frank: What the hell is going on?
Jeff: Dammit, Jerry! I already explained this to you over the phone.
Frank: Whos Jerry?
Jeff: Youre not Jerry?
Frank: Who the fuck is Jerry?!
Jeff: Where the fuck is Jerry?! (he starts to run out again, but comes back to Frank) If anybody asks - We never had this conversation.
(Jeff sprints off left.)
(Jerry runs in from the house. Immediately assumes "catching" pose.)
Jerry: Sorry Im late.
First performed at No Shame Los Angeles on February 9, 2007.