THE PORTRAIT OF THE VIRGIN MARY FEEDING THE DINOSAURS BY JEFF GOODE IS COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL, AND MAY NOT BE PERFORMED, DOWNLOADED, OR RE-TRANSMITTED WITHOUT THE AUTHOR'S CONSENT.
(one by one the sound of switches being thrown, and the house lights go out, but the electronic buzz continues)
(pause, darkness and buzzing)
(then there is the sudden sound of the electronic buzz being sucked out of existence as a light comes up on Rafael)
(Rafael talking on the phone. Same physical position as the last time we saw him, but no painting, and he is located at a different part of the stage.)
Jack, I need a new model.

RAFAEL
Jack I need a new model.
(buzzing sucking sound and light comes up on Jack)
(Jack is sitting at a desk, talking on the phone.)

JACK
(confused:) A new model of what?

RAFAEL
I was working with this girl, but she... she won't... She's an amateur, I need a professional.

JACK
A professional what? ...A doctor?

RAFAEL
No, I need a woman.

JACK
Oh, a prostitute.

RAFAEL
(offended at the implication:) What? A prostitute! Of course not. I need someone to sit for me, Jack.

JACK
Like a dog?

RAFAEL
Yes!

JACK
You need a dog?

RAFAEL
I don't paint dogs! I need a model.

JACK
Did you say "paint"?

RAFAEL
Yes, paint! Jack, I've got to finish this painting. Are you going to help me?

JACK
So you need, like, a fashion model?

RAFAEL
A what?

JACK
A fashion model.

RAFAEL
A what?

JACK
So, you're a painter, right?

RAFAEL
Jack, you know I am a painter. You were at my opening in Florence.

JACK
Who is this?

RAFAEL
Rafael! Jack, don't you remember giving me your card?
(Rafael takes Jack's card out of his pocket, reads it.)
"Jack Dinosaur Talent Agency - Byzantine and Renaissance Portraiture"
(at the same time, Jack looks in his vest pocket, discovers that he also has one of his cards, looks at it.)

JACK
Oh, I'm an agent! (to Audience:) Let's try this again.
(sound of a garage door closing, lights down and back up)

RAFAEL
Jack, I need a new model.

JACK
Raf? Raffi! My God, I haven't seen you since Florence! How have you been?

RAFAEL
I need a new model, Jack.

JACK
Whatsa matter, one of your street corner amateurs can't hold the pose?

RAFAEL
She walked out on me.

JACK
What did I tell you? Undependable! The Great Masters should only work with professional talent. These girls...

RAFAEL
I don't wanna talk about it.

JACK
Whatever you say, Raf. You tell me. What can I do?

RAFAEL
Do you still handle Venus? I've worked with her before, she's very good.

JACK
Good? A goddess, Raf. One of the best. I've got her sitting for Leonardo right now. I can arrange a session for next week. How's that?

RAFAEL
No, I have to finish this painting now.

JACK
All right, let's see what I've got.
(Jack leafs through a stack of headshots)
Olympia. She's good. Titania, Queen of the Fairies. Very talented, wings out to here.

RAFAEL
Uh, no, I need a real woman.

JACK
Blonde? Brunette?

RAFAEL
I don't care. But I need her now.

JACK
Sounds urgent. You got a commission?

RAFAEL
No, I... Dammit, Jack, I just need someone. Can you help me or not?

JACK
Hold on, hold on...
(Jack leafs through a stack of headshots.)
Waitaminute. I've got exactly what you want.

RAFAEL
Who?

JACK
This is absolutely the most talented model in the business today.

RAFAEL
Is she flexible?

JACK
She's available immediately.

RAFAEL
No, I mean, can she do contrapunto?

JACK
She can do anything. She's the best. She's worked for Leonardo, Donatello, Michelangelo. She's done oils, tempera, sculpture, ceilings, friezes, altarpieces. She works hard and I promise you, you will not be disappointed.

RAFAEL
Sounds great. What's her name?

JACK
Mary.

RAFAEL
(writing it down:) Mary?

JACK
Virgin Mary, you've heard of her, right?

RAFAEL
Uh, no. She's a virgin?

JACK
I think it's a stage name.

RAFAEL
And she's available?

JACK
Whenever you are.

RAFAEL
Perfect. I'll give her a call.

JACK
Here's her number.

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