INNKEEPER
(acting as Judge) Court is now in session! Call your first witness! (becomes the Prosecutor) The prosecution calls... Crazy Worm Guy!!

           FATHER SISTER
Objection!

           INNKEEPER
Overruled!

           CRAZY WORM
It's okay. I want to testify.

           (He approaches the witness stand - taking the long way.)

           INNKEEPER
Raise your right hand. Do you swear---

           CRAZY WORM
I do! I got a mouth like a sailor!

           INNKEEPER
State your name for the record.

           CRAZY WORM
Hello, I'm Crazy Worm Guy.

           ALL
Hi, Crazy Worm Guy!

           CRAZY WORM
Hi.

           INNKEEPER
Mister Crazy Worm Guy - if that is your name - What were you doing on the night that Mr. Angry Pants was killed?

           CRAZY WORM
Murdering Mr. Angry Pants.

           FATHER SISTER
Objection!

           INNKEEPER
Overruled! Answer the question!

           CRAZY WORM
I did. I murdered Mr. Angry Pants. My best friend in the whole world.

           INNKEEPER
Did not!

           CRAZY WORM
Did too!

           INNKEEPER
Did not!

           CRAZY WORM
Did too!

           INNKEEPER
Did not!

           CRAZY WORM
Did too!

           INNKEEPER
(triumphantly) No further questions!!

           FATHER SISTER
Your honor, I'd like to cross examine my client.

           INNKEEPER
Proceed.

           FATHER SISTER
Crazy Worm Guy, can you tell me what this is?

           (She takes out a cross.)

           CRAZY WORM GUY
Is it a cross?

           FATHER SISTER
(victorious) Aha!

           (She shows it to the Jury.)

           INNKEEPER
(thwarted) Dammit she's good.

...The End...

           ANNOUNCER
Tune in next time, when the Father-Sister O'Mary O'Fudge says...

           FATHER SISTER
No further questions.

           (CRAZY WORM GUY sheepishly raises his hand.)

           FATHER SISTER
No further questions!!

           (BLACKOUT)